roneva Posted June 29, 2017 Share Posted June 29, 2017 this is the future - scary... Hello! Is this Gordon's Pizza?No sir, it's Google Pizza.I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.No sir, Google bought Gordon's Pizza last month.OK. I would like to order a pizza.Do you want your usual, sir?My usual? You know me?According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called youordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni,mushrooms and meat balls on a thick crust.OK! That's what I want .May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula,sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten free thin crust?What? I detest vegetables.Your cholesterol is not good, sir.How the hell do you know?Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records.We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already takemedication for my cholesterol.Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. Accordingto our database, you only purchased a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once, atDrugsale Network, 4 months ago.I bought more from another drugstore.That doesn't show on your credit card statement.I paid in cash.But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.I have other sources of cash.That doesn't show on your last tax return unless you bought them using anundeclared income source, which is against the law.WHAT THE HELL?I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention ofhelping you.Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp andall the others. I'm going to an island without internet, cable TV, wherethere is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6weeks ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theChad Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 ^^That's closer to the truth than you know, only substitute Google for NSA. But they're catching up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest badbobs95 Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 It's coming! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insatiableOne Posted June 30, 2017 Share Posted June 30, 2017 Two words... fuck google another two words. "Onion router" (TOR) If you want to be safe startmail told big brother to piss off when they wanted access to email Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desertdawg Posted July 2, 2017 Share Posted July 2, 2017 I just don't put personal info online. I mean, if I wanted the world to know that my left nipple loves to be licked more than the right one, or that I still pee on my toes in the shower to prevent athletes foot, then I post it. Otherwise, stay out of my personal life. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GOLDCYLON Posted October 16, 2017 Share Posted October 16, 2017 NSA loves Google and Facebook and...... Now the Apple IPHONE with face recognition Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now